Core Beliefs and Taking Action

Written by Sonia Bajaj, LPC

Life can bring both moments of happiness and sorrow. It can sometimes feel daunting to face challenges that make us feel uncertain about the future. We may find ourselves ruminating endlessly or feeling unfocused and disconnected from others. In these moments, recognizing the roots of our fears can help us make choices according to our values. Here are some self-reflective questions to identify your core beliefs and the actions that align with them.

1. What is it about the present situation that worries you?

2. What would happen if that fearful thing came to pass? 

3. Why would it be so bad? 

4. What is the feeling state or emotion associated with that outcome?

5. Think of a situation you’ve encountered in the past that elicited these emotions. How did you process that experience?

6. Think of someone you admire or of the person you aspire to be. How would that person navigate your present circumstances?

7. Name three values by which your ideal self would live their life.

8. Think of a 3-4 courses of action. Which of these best align with your core values?

This self-reflective process may be best explained with the use of an example: Tina works at a healthcare company. She recently encountered workplace harassment by a colleague. The colleague is well-liked, and she sometimes works with them on projects. Lately she has been noticing feelings of anxiety arise when the staff member is present. She considers her many options, and ultimately worries about making the right decision. These are Tina’s answers to the above questions.

1. I’m worried about having to work with this person when they continue saying things that make me feel uncomfortable. I’m afraid of making a report and of them finding out.

2. They could turn other colleagues against me or make my job more difficult.

3. I would feel like an outcast at a job I love.

4. Alone, unsupported, unloveable

5. I felt disliked and isolated when I was back in school. I processed that experience by counting on family and close friends.

6. I admire my sister. She is very confident and unbothered by others’ opinions of her. She would make the report.

7. Independent, powerful, confident.

8. I could make the report. I could do nothing. I could quit my job. I think the course of action that most aligns with my core values is making the report. 

In this exercise, as long as all parties are safe and unharmed, there is no right or wrong course of action. This is also a fluid process that can be revisited often. Life is a fluctuating experience, and decisions can change with time. Each experience is unique, so you may find it helpful to tailor the questions to suit your particular circumstances.  A clinical therapist can guide you in this process and provide active, in-the-moment reflection of your statements. 

If you’re interested in a personalized cognitive-based approach, reach out to one of our therapists today!